I consider myself lucky for a number of reasons. One of the main ones is that my mum is my very own personal cheerleader. Not just because she’s my mum, but because she runs her own coaching business and I get super helpful support for free! For those of us not lucky enough to have a life coach on standby, I interviewed my mum to get her tips and tricks for how we can all be our own life coaches.
Charlotte: So mum, what exactly is a life coach?
Maggie: There are lots of different definitions, but essentially it’s someone who helps get you from where you are now to where you want to be. It’s not counselling or giving advice. A coach can help you unlock your own potential and come up with your own answers to problems.
C: Why do people usually come to you?
M: A lot of the time it’s because they are feeling stuck or overwhelmed. They could be having trouble dealing with a particular situation, lacking in confidence or just generally feeling a little unhappy. Some people may be considering a career or a life change, while others are recovering from illnesses like cancer, and I help them get back on track.
C: What’s the typical structure of a session?
M: After an introductory chat, we review progress from the previous session and discuss what’s gone well and what they have learned. We then talk about areas they want to work on and set small goals to help them achieve their bigger goal. For example, if a client’s ultimate goal is to change career, one of their weekly goals may be to research different fields or arrange meetings with people.
C: What tools can people use to be their own life coach?
M: My main tip would be to set yourself some goals and write them down, then schedule some regular time out to reflect on these. Whether it’s an hour a week or ten minutes a day, start to think about what is going well and what can you continue to work on.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself:
- What do I want to be and what do I want to do? What do I want to have?
- What’s my ultimate goal? How can I break this down into smaller ones that build up to it? What will help me get there?
- Why do I want these things?
- What advice would I give to a friend in the same situation?
- What advice would a friend give me?
One of the main benefits of having a life coach is that they motivate and encourage you. Have you got anyone in your life that can hold you accountable for the goals you set yourself and you can check in with to keep you going?
Finally, keep a gratitude journal. The more we start to focus on things that are going well, the more we automatically start to focus on the positive aspects of our life and attract more of those things to us.
C: Are there any resources you think people would find helpful?
M: There are a lot of self help books on the market, but some of my favourites are:
‘Feel the fear’ by Susan Jeffers
‘The slight edge’ by Jeff Olsen
‘7 habits of highly effective people’ by Stephen Covey
‘Eat that frog’ by Brian Tracy
C: And if people want to get their own life coach?
M: Make sure you do a ‘chemistry session’ first. It’s important to make sure they are someone you feel you are going to be able to trust and feel comfortable with. A lot of coaches offer a free introductory session. Referral or recommendations of coaches is a good way to find one, as well as google and the official life coach directory.
Maggie Newton is the owner of Red Clematis Coaching Services. https://www.redclematis.co.uk/