JOMO: The Joy of Missing Out Is The New Self-Care

by Johanna Cider
JOMO: The Joy of Missing Out Is The New Self-Care

We’ve all experienced FOMO (fear of missing out) from time to time, but JOMO (joy of missing out) is the new self-care trend we should all be taking an interest in. When all of your friends are out and you’ve decided you’d prefer to stay home on the sofa but seeing all of the pictures makes you wish you’d gone. When you’ve opted out of a holiday because you’ve got other things to save for but you see everyone by the pool and think, “Urgh, I should have gone!” It’s human nature to feel like you’re missing out when you see other people having fulfilling experiences. We all have this constant pressure to “fit in” and stay connected to what everyone else is doing.

But you don’t have to let FOMO rule your life. Embracing the joy of missing out (JOMO) is the new self-care. Here’s how you can make JOMO a part of your life:

Disconnection Is Key

We live in a society obsessed with social media. We post pictures of our food, share updates about our lives, and share videos of all the exciting things we do. While it’s nice to see what other people are up to, social media also has the tendency to fuel FOMO. When your news feed is flooded with images of other people having fun, it’s hard not to feel left out. We see pictures of our friends out and think, “I wish I had gone to that party.” We start comparing our lives to others instead of focusing on ourselves.  

To eliminate FOMO and embrace the joy of missing out, it’s important to make time for “disconnection.” Only when you disconnect from the online world can you fully be in the present moment. It’s a very freeing experience when you’re not concerned with what other people are doing. A weight will be lifted off your shoulders, and you can live your life for you. You can begin this process of disconnection by limiting your screen time. Make sure you are taking regular, extended breaks from all social media. If it makes it easier, delete the social media apps from your phone or put them in a folder that’s not directly accessible so you’re not tempted. Once you become more aware of your screen time, you’ll realise how much time you waste looking at your phone. Replace your usual screen time with meaningful, real-life experiences. Go outside and enjoy nature, where you can take things in and really connect with the outdoors. Appreciate this quiet time without your phone.

The Importance of “Me Time”

Have you ever forced yourself to go out and socialise to avoid FOMO? Have you ever regretted that decision and wish you’d just stayed home? Often times, we give in to social pressure instead of doing what makes us truly happy. We feel guilty for spending time alone and find it hard to say no to other people. But having alone time can be just as fun as hanging out with your best friends. Not only that, but it can also be very therapeutic for the soul. Scheduling regular “me time” gives you space to self-reflect and focus on yourself, without all the outside distractions. It’s okay to put yourself first and embrace the joy of missing out. Experiencing JOMO will encourage you to prioritise your own well-being over anything else.

Your “me time” should be spent doing whatever makes you happy. Stay in for a quiet movie night, take up a new hobby or go for an outdoor hike. Just because everyone else on your feed is out, it really doesn’t mean that reading a book or catching up with your favourite TV show is a bad way to spend your Saturday night. Find an activity that you love to do and stick to it so that you get that regular “me time.” The dominant presence of social media has fuelled FOMO in our society today. That’s why it is so important to “disconnect” often and have time to yourself. Once you prioritise your own happiness, you can practise saying “no”, and forget about what other people are doing so you can embrace JOMO to the fullest.

Remember, It’s Not A Hugely Important Decision – Don’t Stress!

We spend most of our time rushing around from place to place, more often than not in a busy state. We put pressure on ourselves to attend every dinner party, every yoga class, every catch-up meal with friends. We can’t do everything and we can’t be everywhere all at once. While it’s important to nurture our relationships and friendships, and carve in time for self-care, a good way to think when making a decision is that it’s not a big deal. It’s really not worth stressing yourself out if you don’t feel like going out or doing something, and a healthier mentality is to focus on the joy of missing out, and the things you could be doing for you instead. Whether you say “yes” to that brunch that you’ve been invited to or decide you’re staying home to sort through your admin instead, seeing this as an important decision is where the battle in your mind begins.

Just try to think to yourself, “This is not a big decision. What would I prefer to do?” This will help you put less pressure on yourself and make time for the things that you truly want to do, with the people you want to do it with. Learning to spend your time on stuff that matters to you, is when the FOMO will quieten down, and the JOMO will kill in.

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