I’m a junior in college, and feel like I’m not experiencing college the way I should. I have friends, but none that I feel super connected to or that even compare to my besties from home. At my school, there’s a huge greek life so if you’re not in a sorority, it’s difficult to meet new people all the time (I’m not in a sorority). I hate college and I can’t wait to graduate, yet so many people have told me college was the best time of their lives. My question is… Is it ok not to feel like college is the prime of your life? Am I totally doomed to be miserable for the rest of my life because I haven’t enjoyed my college experience? – Anabell
Dear That’s Literally How I Feel!
Honestly, college was amazing, I had a great time, it was awesome, but I don’t look back on it like the ultimate best time of my life. So yes, that is completely okay to feel that way. There’s a lot of pressure to have college be this incredible, epic journey and often times it falls flat of that expectation. I know it must be hard seeing everyone around you having an amazing time – but guess what? Maybe this is their best time of their life. Maybe they don’t have besties back home, maybe they finally met people they really connect with. Maybe they’re feeling like they finally fit in somewhere. Their story doesn’t have to be your story.
Your “best time of your life” can be anywhere, any time. I love my post-college life SO much more than my college life but I also often think exactly what you do: Am I going to regret not loving college more?
The simple answer is no. This particular experience just isn’t what you want or need right now. But your next one might be. And if not that one, the one after. It’s also okay to feel a little uncomfortable at some points in our lives, we need that. It’s not all supposed to be easy.
That being said you still have to wake up every morning and be there, so might as well make the most of it. See if there isn’t some wiggle room in who you think you are. Try some things or activities or groups you normally wouldn’t imagine yourself being remotely into.
I know we all think we have ourselves figured out, but if you’re anything like me, and it kind of sounds like you are, it’s amazing how much you can keep discovering.